is it possible that my daughter is mistaken?
My daughter was sexually abused by my former husband. Her new stepfather was accused by her for the same thing. Is it possible after being with him for so many years for her to be confused by him doing this instead of her former stepfather. She never really went to counseling for this and even my mother in law has asked me to explain to her what happened to her before. Is it possible that she is having a memory lapse as i know he being my husband did not do these things as he is nothing like this to her and she is confused so much by this that she is starting to fail in school. How can we get dhs to make this unsubstantiated.
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And just how do you know your husband didn't do this? It's possible this is some kind of weird transference on her part but at the same time it's possible that you picked yet another guy for which child abuse is a serious compulsion. I say get her to a doctor and then get her to a counselor immediately.
First explain to your daughter what has happened to her in the past now maybe if she is mistaken she will realize the difference. Your current husband might have been doing this to her you can't know that. You need to be honest with him and this may seem funny but if your daughter is really upset and you don't have answers take him to a lie detector test. Also get your daughter some help it will help her too. Talk to the school psychologist and see if he/she can talk to her. Obviously your daughter needs help. You are both in my prayers.
Yeah, I thought that of my daughter's stepfather too...he even adopted her. I didn't find out until she was of age and we were divorced that he had molested her, but it has been the most life-altering event of her life, and the most painful event in my life as I wasn't able to protect her. Do NOT make the mistake of taking this risk. Of course your mother-in-law sees it the way she sees it and wants you to suggest to your daughter that she may be having a memory loss. She's protecting her son. That's so obvious that I can't believe you don't see that. Why haven't you taken her to counseling? This is a cancer. If she had leukemia would you not tend to her health? Girl, get your head out of the clouds and stop worrying about anyone but your daughter. You're her mother. Protect and take care of her and don't worry about ANYONE but her!
It sounds to me that she is blurring her memories of one authority figure with those of another - very common.
But you should also make sure that he really did not do anything to her. It's also very common for a woman to leave one sexually abusive husband only to be attracted to a man with the same traits that make him sexually abusive. So you really need to make sure he is innocent before you blame your daughters memory.